Winter: Just In Time For Spring

      Coming home from California, I expected to come home to snow. I was grateful to return home to a warm Colorado winter, but as time went on I began to miss the wintery wonderland that is home. I kept hearing "There's snow in the forecast this weekend!" or "We're supposed to get snow tonight!". Yeah right. 

     Just when I was giving up hope, the temperatures were starting to climb, and flowers were starting to bloom, I should have known that Colorado would be throwing me a curve ball. And just in time for spring!

     My town is a magical place in the winter. I am happy that this is home for right now. Here's the view from my street on the one cold, snowy day since I've been back.

     Our house looks awfully charming covered in snow. Our apartment is the window by the table.
 

     The view from our front porch. Our house isn't the only crooked one on the street apparently.
 

     This is looking directly across the street from our front porch. I love being surrounded by big trees and the mountains.
 

     Here's to appreciating the things I undervalued in the past. Every year seems to be different. I either love it or hate it, and this year, I am grateful for this Colorado Wonderland.

Update: Colorado Living

     Oh my, I have been a slacker these days when it comes to blogging. Here's an update of what's been going on here in Colorado, and hopefully I'll have some pictures of town and life to share with you all soon. I've been feeling slightly...unmotivated, and trying hard not to let that feeling take over.

     Life has been falling back in to a normal routine. I'm still slowing bringing things home from storage and trying to make our place cozy. 

     I've been on the job hunt for a while now and haven't had too much luck. I keep waiting for feelings and I'm not getting them. For those of you who don't know me well, I'm a very feelings person. I get these gut feelings sometimes that I just have to go along with. Such as my previous job. I vowed I would never work in childcare, and as soon as I saw that job listed in the newspaper, and I knew instantly I was meant to apply and that I would get the job. I haven't had that feeling yet. Well...not completely. I have a few conflicted feelings about a couple places, so prayer for clarity would be greatly appreciated. I have a follow up interview at Sports Authority today, which I had a good feeling about yesterday, and today have an odd conflicted feeling about. 

     This past weekend I went to Lunafest with my mother-in-law. For those of you who don't know what Lunafest is (like me before researching it) you can find out all about it here and perhaps attend one in a town near you! It was a fun night with dinner beforehand, and then the film festival at the historic Hotel Colorado.

     Yesterday I helped a dear friend substitute (she substituted, I mostly observed for future reference) at a local private school that we both have a soft spot for. She graduated from the school as well as taught there, and I spent much of my childhood with people who attended the school, went on field trips with them, and took a few classes there as well.

     I've been trying to branch out more and surround myself with people. I've spent a lot of time with good friends, been hanging out at the local coffee shop, gone to Trivia Night at the local burger place where my husband works, spent time with his friends, went to a worship concert in Basalt, assisted substituting, attended a women's film festival. I'm trying to say yes to things I might otherwise have said no to. I feel like since I was in California, that I am more outgoing and want to be around people more. 

     I'm trying to get back in to the swing of things as far as eating healthy and working out. Which hasn't been too successful so far, but I'm going to try and really start this journey in the next week or so. Prayers!

     I've spent a lot of time walking around lately, and taking in the beauty that is a small mountain town. I'm learning to be content where I am and find splendor in the small things. Snow gently kissing the tops of the mountains, tiny flowers popping up along the sidewalks, the familiar feel of my favorite coffee shop, running in to friends unexpectedly. 

    I may not know exactly what I'm going yet, but I know I'll figure out. Life doesn't stand still, and I don't want to either. So for now, I'll continue to love where I'm at, and be grateful for every second. I will try and blog more and keep you updated. 

There are some discounted prices at the shop! Please take a look and maybe something will say "buy me!", hehe.

Check out my Etsy shop here!

  

Reflecting and Gettin' Real.

     As my time in California is drawing to an end, I've been reflecting on the time I've spent here. I will fully admit, this adventure did not turn out the way I had envisioned 3 months ago....

     When the plan to move to California first sprouted, I saw it as an opportunity to do all that I've dreamed of doing. Spend every weekend at the beach, find local and cozy coffee shops, discover off-the-beaten-path bookstores, meet new and interesting people, wander around L.A., find some random restaurant that ends up having the most fabulous food. You know...the stereotypical SoCal experience that's always portrayed in the movies. But, like most things that happen in movies, LIFE tends to take a different course.

     But, I've spent these past few months living with my mom and siblings; an experience I haven't had in 3 years, and a time that I can't replace. I could say I've met new people, as my youngest siblings (age 7 and 11 today) were so young when I lived at home, and I've only just now had the opportunity to see who they are becoming.

     I've become closer with my 17 year old sister. A new best friend. Which is going to make leaving that much harder. I've had someone to talk to, someone to complain to, someone to adventure with, someone to be silly with. This is time I won't ever get back as I leave them here to pursue their new life, and I head home to pursue mine.

     I've been able to live with my Grandma again (after about 20 years!) and that is something I will treasure forever. We've had lunch dates, gone to the gym together, and spent time talking about life and my Grandpa.

A song my Grandpa would play and sing for my Grandma. It always made her cry.

   I may not have had the ideal experience I was hoping for, but we did discover an adorable Japanese General Store, visited an Asian Market, tried new coffee shops, and even made an evening trip to the beach on New Year's Eve.



     If I had been galavanting around constantly, I wouldn't have taken the time to get to know myself. I wouldn't have taken the time to pursue what I love, to write, to paint, to create, to play music....

      I would have been too "busy" to want to focus on a new study my mom, sister, and even a good friend have been doing an online. The women leading the group have inspired me even more to not believe the lies that the world can throw at me about what I love to do. Maybe I'm not the greatest writer or painter, and I'm not rich from selling the jewelry and other things I make, but it brings me joy, and if it makes me happy, surely it can bring inspiration to others. 

You can read about my "Becoming" stories here and here!

     I've learned to embrace me and who God has designed me to be. If you would like to join in the 8 week, totally free study, visit this link. The study has been empowering for me, and I think it will be for you as well.

    
     These past 3 months have given me experiences that I can't recreate from the movies. This has been real life; time that can't be replaced. Life can change so suddenly, you have to hold on to these precious moments.

     As life slowly begins to become "normal" again, I pray that I won't lose sight of everything I've learned about myself. I don't want to lose momentum with my Etsy pursuits. I want to be able to continue painting and writing. It's going to be a huge adjustment as I head back home to the snow, move in to an apartment I've never seen, find a new job, and rediscover my relationship with my best friend, my love....

     My husband will be getting here today with his best friend and my brother-in-law. In a weeks time, I will be loading all my belongings in to the back of our Subaru, and making the 12 hour drive home with these three. It's going to be a bittersweet moment. 
     I know while they're here, we'll be able to create some of the memories I've been longing to make while I've been on my "adventure". I will be photographing every day and sharing them as I find time. Here's to squeezing 3 months time in to one week of adventuring!

Embracing Life

     When it rains, I feel somber. Melancholy. Pensive. And I love it. Sometimes, I wish it would rain for weeks on end. It's the perfect time to be still and reflect. To sit cozy with a book and a mug of coffee. To paint a picture....

     I've found myself the last two days writing. The thoughts just flow into my head and I record them without rhyme or reason. I'm not sure what the cause of this is, perhaps Holy inspiration, but I'm loving the freedom of expression. 

     I've been sitting down and letting the words flow from my pen onto the paper without really even knowing what I'm saying. No deep thoughts. No profound ideas. Just writing. Releasing emotions and thoughts that were hiding for no reason other than being afraid of my own judgement towards myself. Towards my words, my thoughts, my art.... The words seem disconnected; but it feels like another person has written these streams of sentences. I like it that way.

     I am praying to adapt this mindset always, starting in 2015 and beyond. My words are no less great than Charles Dickens or Jane Austen. My ideas and thoughts are no less profound than Albert Einstein. At least in Jesus' and my eyes. 

     I am the unique individual. From here on out, I will stop trying to please the crowd. I will begin to focus on me and the impact I might have on those around me. I won't be judgmental of my words and ideas because they are mine. They were given to me by Someone who knows my heart, my mind, my life. They should be used to inspire others and not meant for my own selfish want of the perfect sentence, the perfect journal entry. Does anyone else have this obsession with the "perfect journal"? 

     I have many empty journals. Yet I keep acquiring more. Why? Because I want to fill these pages with life, with passion, with love. I want the words to drip from the pages as someone reads my story and cries. I want my words to inspire laughter. Yet here sit these empty books. Many times have I begun to write my "story" only to rip out the pages when the thoughts don't flow, and the words become jumbled, and the story isn't perfect. Selfish. Absurd. Wrong. 
     
     I look at old photographs of people in days gone by, and I want to know them. I want to hear their story, I want to know their thoughts. But who will want to know my story? Who will wonder what I thought on a rainy day in 2015? 

     No story is more worth telling than my own. And that is a truth I have only recently accepted. The words of the world, their lies, have led me to believe that because I'm not a world traveler, wealthy, or a genius, that my story isn't worth people's notice. Not true. Each story, each of our stories, your story is special. Don't be afraid to tell it. There's no greater time than now, for there may not be a tomorrow.

     I strongly encourage you to embrace yourself this year, this great 2015 that is just begun. Move past the lies in your head, the lies that are fed to you. Become who you are destined to be. It's not somewhere down the road, it's not something you missed out on, it's now. Now. "The enemy lies to you heart to bring you down, but God is for you."

     He is for who you are right now. Be that light, be that love, be that story that you are destined to be. Explore your mind, your words, your actions. Trial and error is life, and the imperfection is what makes it perfect. 

     
     My theme for this year: I will judge myself no more. 

Empowering. Freeing. Peace inspiring.

Post-Christmas

     I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas! 

     Although Christmas was different this year for us, we had a great day filled with gifts, good food, family, and love. I was thoroughly spoiled (as always) and ate way too much. We spent the morning at my Grandma's house where we opened gifts and devoured cinnamon rolls and monkey bread (after some baking mishaps). Then we drove to my Aunt's house where we had second Christmas, spent time with family, and of course indulged in turkey, tamales, potatoes galore (my 3 favorites), and so many desserts. I ended the day tired, and with a cold I was trying to keep away all day, but it was worth it.

     I wanted to share some Christmas traditions in my family.

•    Growing up, we got to open one small gift on Christmas Eve. I'm not sure if it's meant to build the anticipation or temporarily satisfy until the morning.... Since my husband and I were apart this year, we decided to have Christmas on Christmas Eve via Skype and open our gifts to each other early.
•    We open our stockings after everything else has been opened. This year we forgot to fill the stockings, so we passed out the candy and small gifts from a Target bag (hey, you make due with what you have).
•    In my "new" family (my husband and I), we have orange cinnamon rolls for Christmas breakfast. Two years ago, I made them in the waffle iron. Delicious!
•    My Aunt's family serves tamales for Christmas dinner. This is definitely a tradition I think I will be incorporating in to my family celebrations.
•    I usually fill my husband's stocking with the same 3 things each year: gum, gummy worms, and a Monster energy drink. It's always topped off with an assortment of candy, maybe a gift card, or a couple small gifts. I was sad I wasn't able to do that this year, but I sent him a big box full of goodies. I'm regretting not taking a picture of it though. My heart that longs for beauty sure enjoyed decorating the inside of the box and coordinating all the individually wrapped gifts. Maybe the Husband didn't notice, but I noticed, and that's what matters, right? Haha!

          

 What are some of your family traditions?

 

Merry Christmas: Sing Hallelujahs

     Merry Christmas my friends! I hope this day find's you happy and well. 

     Our day is starting off with coffee (the most important) and tearing in to all the colorful gifts. I was feeling more nostalgic this year, and found wrapping paper that has probably been sitting in my Grandma's house since the 1990's. So I threw pretty, sweet, handmade wrapping out the window, and decided to use what was already at the house for that touch of childhood I'm so desperately holding on to this season.

     This Christmas brings many emotions for people in all walks of life. For me and my family, this Christmas is laced with sadness. Many of you know, my Grandpa passed away in October, which makes this holiday season bittersweet. He battled cancer for many years, and thankfully we had the opportunity to come out to California last Christmas because we knew it could possibly be his last. Our Christmas was sweet and cozy, with all of us gathered around the tree and dinner at my Aunt's home with a surplus of good food. This year will be the same, but we all feel that piece of us missing.

     Grandpa was the most generous, open-hearted person you could meet. So many people loved him and speak about how kind and giving he was. Christmas and birthdays, we kids always felt so spoiled because he made sure to go above and beyond. He showed his love through giving. 

     Kind of like someone else. Jesus. We couldn't celebrate this miracle of Christmas if Jesus hadn't come to live among us. To love and to teach and give. He gave his life so that we may live. Let's just step back a minute from our Christmas hustle and bustle and really think about that for a moment. I mean really think about that. Can your mind comprehend the power of that act of love? Because honestly, it's hard for me to wrap my insignificant brain around. Me, being selfish, proud, sometimes hard-hearted...someone would want to die so I could live? It's mind-blowing and can bring you to your knees. Today, I pray, as you go about your day and prepare your meals, spend time with loved ones, listen to Christmas music, sing hallelujahs to His holy Name! In your heart, with your voice, in your soul.

"Suddenly a great company of heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, 'Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.' "

- Luke 2:13-14

     Be safe as you go about celebrating today. Shower love wherever you can. I pray that if today your heart is sad or hardened, you may find peace and happiness in some small thing. Try giving time or money or even food to someone less fortunate than yourself. Sometimes even a note or a smile is enough to brighten someone's day. So as we go our separate ways today and celebrate our Christmas, I hope you can revel in the beauty of snow, the miracle of a "baby's first Christmas", maybe your flight got delayed but you still arrived at your destination safe. There are so many things to inspire awe this holiday season from our Savior's birth to the tiniest snowflake. As for me, I will sing hallelujahs and shed a few tears of sadness, as well as joy.

Merry Christmas to you all!

Festive in Red

     Here's another little something that I thought was pretty. This Christmas Eve is a little grey and dreary, and we're all feeling a little out of sorts it seems. So, here are some festive, red berry...type...things that I couldn't resist capturing.

     Here's one of my favorite Christmas songs to listen to as well (link at the end of post). If you like this rendition, check out Seabird's other songs on Amazon or iTunes. My favorite song is O Come, O Come Emmanuel, and of course that one isn't on YouTube! His album is my go-to at Christmas time. Over The Hills and Everywhere: A Christmas EP.

Seabird: Angels We Have Heard On High

Star of Wonder

     I've never been very good at keeping up with devotionals. I still have a hard time committing to reading something every day. Which is sad when you think about it, since they're usually just a short 5 minute thing. But I'm only human.

     My grandma gave me a devotional called Jesus Calling by Sarah Young. I don't remember to read it every day, but when I do I am glad I did. It's written as if Jesus was speaking, and it always seems to be relevant to the kind of day I am having. She finishes the page with a few Scripture references for further studying. Today's reading was exactly what I needed to hear today, and in honor of Christmas week, I wanted to share it. I hope it resonates with you as it does me.

"Come to Me, and rest in My presence. As you ponder the majestic mystery of the Incarnation, relax in My everlasting arms. I am the only Person who was ever sired by the Holy Spirit. This is beyond your understanding. Instead of trying to comprehend My Incarnation intellectually, learn from the example of the wise men. They followed the leading of a spectacular star, then fell down in humble worship when they found Me. Praise and worship are the best responses to the wonder of My being. Sing praises to My Holy Name. Gaze at me in silent adoration. Look for a star of guidance in your own life, and be willing to follow wherever I lead. I am the Light from on high that dawns upon you, to guide your feet into the way of Peace."

     I forget to slow down and revel in the miracle that is our Savior's birth. Try reading Matthew 2:9-11. Imagine how those Wise Men felt!